The next ordeal of the night was getting to Stuben’s, it’s on the same street as Chief Two’s house but about 10 blocks away which isn’t much in small little Pueblo, but in Denver it’s quite a walk for we all had three, or four beers maybe five and weren’t about to drive, and it’s freezing outside. So we are on our walk down the Pearl Street of good ol’ Capital Hill in Denver… and all the sudden Justin finds these glasses; white, black, pink, girlie, and have a peace sign on the side. I say, “Let me have those, they can go on our little adventure to Stuben’s and where ever else we decide we will go.” He hands them over and this is where the adventure of the Glasses begin…

This is about the time I decided… I am going to blog about our little adventure and see what happens.

So we arrive at Stuben’s and yes the deal; burger, beer, and fries for five bucks is totally true and almost too good to be true!! It was amazing. The waiter asks us what kind of beers we want, and of course shitty ones, but who can complain the burger alone was a 6 or 7 dollar burger anywhere else. So I choose the Miller High Life, because that what Kenny Powers of East Bound and Down would want me to do.

The burger and the fries (extremely greasy, but good) were a lot better than the beer, but the Glasses became famous on that beer, it was the first picture I had taken with them. We all got down on those burgers. I think mine went down in about seven and a half minutes and even Justin was kinda amazed, “Damn Fred did you even chew that burger?” Little did he know my stomach was about to kick my wallet’s ass for making me wait that long. Steven was getting the beers from under-agers that couldn’t have them. “Joey when you order yours. You should see if they will shoot your beer to me.” says Steven. So Joey asked the waiter and the waiter didn’t hesitate, “Sure man another Olympia for you?” said the waiter to Steve. ”Hell yeah, Thanks!” said Steven. Then the other three people that showed up with Joey, also underage, Steve was going to try to get their’s too and I think he was like better not push it. So he didn’t.

Since I had inhaled my burger, fries, and beer deal. I had chilled for a little finishing my Miller High Life and so after Justin was done. We decided it would be a good idea to get our smoke on… so we stepped outside and smoked a cigarette.

While we were smoking, I said, “I think these glasses would look good on that bike, I think I am going to take a picture on them.” “Why would you do that?” said Justin. I replied, ”Because they are semi-gay glasses for us to be walking around with, and single speed bikes are super gay.” As I looked at Justin for approval, he didn’t say anything, but I think he approved. So I took this picture, hoping that the tight jeaned, fixed gear queer would have walked out while we were setting up this “super gay picture”. But, he/she didn’t.

We finished our smoke and continued to laugh about the glasses on the bike and I decided that it would be great to take a picture at the ashtray since it was so pretty. It was covered in all different kinds of stickers and you couldn’t see any of the gross butts in it because they were all hidden. I also wondered what the yellow thing was that was hanging from it so I decided to include that into the picture.  Justin and I were now done filling our lungs with cancer causing chemicals from the smokes. Camel Blue was my preferred choice, while J Greer choked down an American Spirit… not sure if it was the yellow or blue pack, I am guessing yellow though.

On the way back in to get our buddy, my other tribe member, Chief Two Feather; I almost ran into this pole. It must have been jealous of our self proclaimed bad ass glasses. “Would you like to take a picture with these glasses?” I asked the pole. Absolute silence, as I looked at the pole waiting for an answer. Hey maybe inanimate objects can express their feeling, I don’t know. I put the glasses on the pole and proceeded to take a shot.  After the shot, I showed the exposure to J Greer and asked him, ”Justin what do you think about this shot?” He replied, “It’s pretty good, even looks like it is smiling.” I think he was referring to the little gray mark about 3 inches down on the side. I am glad I made that poles night.

So after the glorious cancer sticks and a few pics, we stumbled back into the amazing deal holding pub to relocate our buddy, Chief Two Feather, yeah Steven. While we were away he had decided he was going to eat more so we had to wait for him to punch down some more fries and some green chile that he had ordered. After saying later to all the under-agers that I didn’t know besides Joey, we paid and got the F out of there. But yes, definitely not before the Glasses posed it up in some peppermint candies. Damn they look good, don’t know if it was the glasses or the candy.

“So what do you guys wanna do now?” Steven shoots to us as we are walking out of the bar/pub/food spot. I think it was Justin who said, “Wanna go to the Streets?” (That’s a bar that is located on Colfax about 15 blocks away from where we were.) “Yeah I am down!” said Steven and of course I agreed because I had nothing better to do. So where is it at I had asked. (Even though I had already told ya’ll)

“It’s only like fifteen blocks away,” said Steven. “I am okay with it then, I could use another drink.” I replied. So the decision was made, but we decided to sit outside of Stuben’s for another fifteen minutes talking to everyone we ate with. While we were there I learned of a way to water trees for a long period of time, or maybe I just put some sense into the ice that was dumped on the sidewalk. I figured the glasses were some type of environment loving things, due to the peace sign, so I allowed them to pose on our collaborative idea that Stuben’s dumped there ice there to water the tree throughout the night into tomorrow, or however long it took to melt this ice.  Well back to the conversation, we were still talking to everyone and one of us complained how we were going to walk all the way to the Streets. (It’s actually “The Streets of London”, but we compressed it to the Streets.) And this homie, and I wish I could remember his named offered us a ride, and of course we took it.

So while we were in the car I had said, “Yo J, take a pic with the glasses since you are part of this amazing and fun adventure.” He took them and put them on his face immediately and I was actually semi-surprised because I didn’t think he would. So that is his sexy ass to the left just so all you ladies know.

And to the right is Steven a.k.a. Chief Two Feather. He had a little scuffle a few nights previous to this one so we decided to do a little less of a face shot, and I don’t think he wanted those pretty little shades on his face.

So we are getting this ride to the bar, but the driver (forgot his name) decided to park 4 blocks away from the bar, I don’t know maybe we had different ideas of what a ride to the bar is. (Hey, don’t get all sad, I am definitely thankful for the ride just expressing my idea of what a ride to the bar means. Damn, sorry for giving my two cents.) But anyway, maybe I shouldn’t be upset, it allowed for me to add to this adventure a little bit more. On the way to the bar, our 4 block walk, Steven took a pee next to this fire hydrant. (I could have posted that pic, but this is a PG blog, maybe I will start a more x-rated one for the others. And no I didn’t get he dick, I am not gay.) And yes I decided the Glasses needed a pic. I thought they looked good with the yellow background!!

After Steven’s super long pee, we called the river ”The Chiefies Stream along Colfax”, we continued our walk to the Streets. Along the walk we ran into some vespas, so we put the glasses there on the back. These are very good transportation devices, especially when you live in Denver, or if your wallet isn’t fat like most of the people that work for the gas companies. (That’s a whole other rant so we will stop right there.) So we finished our lovely walk of the last two blocks along Colfax, and we arrived. To the “Streets of London” we go.

So as we enter the bar, of course get carded… but after the door it was like walking into a crowded Disney Theme Park ride line. There were people everywhere, at every level of intoxication. It was extremely funny to watch some of the extremely drunk people interacting.  As I fought my way towards the bar, I run into Clint Elliot. Yeah exactly, he’s from Pueblo, in a Denver bar. (It’s a Small World” music playing.) “Fred… Fred, what the f!@# are you doing here?” He shouted at me over the thousand voices collaborating together, sounding as if we were in a small riot. “Clint what’s up buddy!”  I replied. Then we start to push our way towards the bar together… On our way, I run into the Italian Bear, Eli Cash….

This is one huge dude!! He’s an artist, from Pueblo, now living in Denver. He comes to throw down a bunch of lingo to me about doing art for my skateboard company. I am flattered at the point and definitely going to use some of his art!! But at the time he is the biggest guy in the bar just looking down at me talking to me. He was explaining to me about his art when Gutierrez worked his way through the mob… wondering who was his friend, the Italian Bear talking to?? (Me of course, but you couldn’t see me due to his size.)

Finally Brian made his way around and noticed me, the other part to the “Geezer Games of Skate” (another story). He freaks out because yeah, out of the millions of bars he could have been at, he picks the one I end up at… (again “It’s a Small World” comes on)

So we work our way to the bar, and actually come up on a table. That is a huge accomplishment considering the amount of people were there… Almost positive they were well over capacity, but who’s counting?? After we get to the table.. and chat for a second and say how crazy it is we run into each other 120 miles from home, and get a drink from some waitress Clint was drooling over all night, I explain my little adventure. The GLASSES!! Come on, did I lose you already.. Pay Attention!!

Well if you didn’t notice I got all of them to take pics with the glasses, Clint’s is pretty good!! He’s the guy slamming the Pabst.  Then Eli, with the hand tats, looking like an Italian Bear. And of course, B-Boy B-Nice ( That’s Brian G’s name, ask him about it if you don’t know) holding the glasses at the table….  Then this guy, I totally forgot his name, just like many others throughout the night, but I do remember it’s Eli’s roommate!!

But wait there’s more… I fight my way through the crowd after helping Clint with his drool to go smoke a cig with B-Nice… There are two places too smoke… one in front, one out back, we decide to go to the back allowing us the joy of fighting through the alcohol crazed mob.

While out there, ( a contained back room with heaters, nice but smokey!!) I found this cooler. It was like a calling from the glasses. “I want a pic here” not that the glasses talk, but like I said sometime inanimate objects talk to me. I liked the 303 on there, helps give you, the reader, our location. 303 is Denver’s area code if you don’t know!!

Well even though we were in a literal cloud of smog (smokey fog), I was able to notice a few people including Whit!! Awesome skater, from THE DENVER SHOP. See how smokey it was??

Here I am, yeah those are handle bars, it March for God sake!! I think Ol’ J-Greer took this pic… Not too sure. I like the “This is not an exit” sign behind me, even though you could easily walk out this door. I figured I would be the only one to rock those shades like that so that’s why I did!!

So I had to pee pretty bad and didn’t want to be surrounded by smoke anymore… I walked towards the bathroom and felt kinda artsy, so I had the GLASSES pose by this electrical breaker box with a bunch of scribbles by it… oh that’s graffiti? My bad.. LOL. I am kidding, but still don’t understand why people do it, but too-each-there-own!!

So here is the beautiful urinal that I got to pee in… Yeah not to clean!! This is the only bathroom in the entire bar. Well there is a shitter, one stall over, but there are only two places for expelling body waste for the entire bar. Almost makes you wonder how many are ticketed for peeing in public next to this bar. I did, once there was a line, not going to lie!!

So after peeing a storm up in the crappy bathroom I continued to get a couple of drinks… not for myself. I decided I would buy Pete Eldridge a drink, yeah the pro for Mystery Skateboards, the East Coaster!! After talking to him for a little, I feel like I have known his pain for a really long time… I ain’t going to tell you what he explained to me but, I feel it!!

Back to the GLASSES that is what this is all about. Ends up the beers I bought for Pete, yeah two, one for him and one for his buddy… Well his buddy ended up being my BESTIE!! You guessed it, Chief Two, you already forgot his name?? Steven…

Well Stevie and I stepped out front to smoke because it was just too smokey in the back. That is when I decided to take this pic of the front of “The Streets” with the glasses. Pretty good pose too for an non-living object.

Then Steve decided we should put them by his beer… Not sure why but looks like the GLASSES liked it.  HELL YEAH, look how they are hugging it!! Almost make a great couple I guess, not sure, not much of a match maker…

Scratch that!! Look at this match!!

Just kidding, but this is probably the highlight of the GLASSES adventure. Hanging out with all of us, getting all this attention, sitting on Steven’s face while he is accomplishing such a feat, (having a hurt face, drinking a beer, smoking a cig, all while chilling with me!! Well chilling with me doesn’t mean much, but I threw it out there and you tried to catch it!@)

Well the night isn’t over yet..

We still had to get some pool shots in for the glasses…

Definitely some Red Bull and Vodka drinks… yeah this one is mine!!

Also we need to get more people involved in this adventure…. Let’s go find some people too get in on this adventure with the GLASSES!! So after we had a few more drinks and said good-bye to some friends we already had made and some we even knew, we decided to make some more friends… I think it was B-Nice (Brian G) who had went to the back with me to smoke in the cloud again. Yeah it was Brian!!

This was our first new friend!! I introduced her to the GLASSES and explained our adventure, well since the GLASSES can’t talk. “So would you take a picture with these?” I asked. “Hell yeah, that’s so awesome!” She replied. We then took I think two pics because the first wasn’t good enough. Then after she approved it she said, ”Do not post this on FaceBook because I had called off work today and I am also going to call off in the morning.” I almost told her she was retarded, because you have to be friends with people before they could even see any picture… but I didn’t, I am so nice!! (Look I even waited a few weeks to post it on the blog!!)

This girl to the right is AWESOME!! Maybe not the hottest girl, but definitely one of the nicest girls I have ever met! Once I had explained to her the adventure she was definitely into it! “I would love to take a pic.. no just give them to me I will put them on!!” she said.  Look at the smile, she was definitely into being friends with the GLASSES. I wonder if I had anything to do with it… Doubt it!!

Now this one… LOL, very funny. I had asked the girl, “Hey do you wanna take a picture with these GLASSES for the adventure we are on?”  “No, but he would!” she replied. “Well where is he?” I had asked and she put the glasses on this girl, I mean dude that acted like a girl! I was kinda weirded out  by him but whateves, we (the GLASSES and I) aren’t prejudice.

Now this girl, not as awesome as the other, but definitely awesome took a pic right as we were going to leave. I had said, “Hey don’t I know you??” she replied, “Hey Fred!”…. Blank.. blank.. blank.. (OH YEAH I thought to myself..) “You’re that awesome girl that gave us a ride last night!!” I yelled. “Yeah what are you guys doing?” she said. “I thought you were blond” Steven said. She just laughed… and we ended up all walking home together.

No I didn’t hook up with her…. Steve did!! Yeah after that line, I thought he was crashing to the earth after being shot down by an enemy fighter, but his parachute must have been perfect because he definitely hooked up with her that night!@!

And even to top it off, before we left, we made her wait outside the fence for about five minutes while we said later to Steve’s neighbor, Tracy and her hot friend!! Oh and I made her take a pic with the GLASSES to complete the adventure!!

Then when she was handing them back to be…. “OH SHIT!” <crash> She drops them… “I am so sorry.” she said. “No it’s cool they are alright.” I replied. Then I noticed the lens fell out! Damn I thought to myself… is that the adventure? is it over? I lean over and pick them up… the lens fell out because the plastic band that held it in had broken from the contact with the beer soaked green concrete. It wasn’t over yet I placed the lens back in and we proceeded to leave the bar… on our merry way home. Steve and his new found friend and me and the GLASSES walking back around 18 blocks on our way home….

Then I thought… you can’t have adventures all the time… and they can’t last forever…

SO I SMASHED THEM!! AND SAID THANKS FOR THE ADVENTURE!!!

HAVE A GREAT DAY!! fredCARLEY

“Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising which tempt you to believe that your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires courage.”
~Ralph Waldo Emerson~

Thanks Ralph.. especially for going outside of the norm and contemplating ideas for yourself… whether you’re right or not.

The first part of this idea.. which will be very complicated to most. I think, it would be great if you did understand, but you probably wont, or misconstrue it… oh whatever

The First Part:  The first part of my idea is a feeling I have had… It like one of the gut feeling that one may get when the individual is about to get in trouble for something, or see someone doing something and this strong emotion pours through your everything, hoping the best for the individual. I get this feeling, especially after the DREAM… later in this idea you will know of this. I feel like the world is going to collapse in on itself… like we are creating our own DOOM. This feeling of I need to talk, do something, help in someway, push to make it not come over me anymore….  …NOT POSSIBLE, well at least I think from my experiences of trying to explain this.

This feeling is like I see us going the wrong way… and I see our entirety taking the wrong steps, or using the wrong technique and about to take a slam, like a skateboarder who is about to slam down a 12 stair handrail because of lack of confidence. (sorry I skate, if you hesitate you will fall most of the time)(also I compare things to it because I know it, if you don’t…. go watch a skater do something scary and think of the consequences he may face.. or you would face if you were in his shoes…. and you will understand the feeling.)

I only started with the feeling, because it is the main reason I have thought of this idea.. that may have flaws but I feel it’s a great start!! I know that this IDEA that I will share with people in my blogs to come, and some of my previous one are part of it, that maybe a few other with start conversation and maybe say I am totally wrong and have some motivation to help get the goal of my idea out there…

“If you only do what you know you can do, you never do very much.”
~Tom Krause~

In Part 2, I will express my goal from this IDEA

“Friends are the family we choose for ourselves”
 ~Edna Buchanan~

I have many friends… of all ages, sizes, races and levels of education.  Some live near me some live a few cities away, some I have never even met in person. A few I haven’t even talked to in years, but others we talk everyday. But there’s a problem with the word friend… it’s to inclusive… to big of a word to call some people and sometimes to small of word to call others.

For instance… my Facebook page says I have 266 friends as of now… I couldn’t even imagine having that big of a family. I really don’t even know if I have talked to that many different people in my lifetime? Some of them are true friends though also…

The only way I can put my finger on this is that there are levels to friendship… and these are the levels I have come up with

1. acquaintance
2. a person you have something in common with
3. some one you admire
4. a friend
5. true friend
6. family

These are the levels that I have made and could add all the people I consider friends into… and none are apart of my family unless they reach level 4… and 5 and 6 are definitely more important to me. Is it wrong to rate your friends?? Am I a bad friend for rating my friends??

 I don’t really do this, but there is definitely difference in importance of certain friends to other friends. I know that part of it might be that I am from a really small family and don’t need a bunch of people around me to be happy, but I have noticed that I do have to have people around me to be happy. I have also noticed that I have had friends that I would consider family until some event caused them to drop down in the levels, and it’s really hard for them to re-gain that level again, even though I don’t tell them that. Is this bad of me?? Should I give more forgiveness?? I have always wondered what I am supposed to do in these situations.. This is a good quote to explain that…

“Friendship is like a glass ornament, once it is broken it can rarely be put back together exactly the same way.”
~Arnold H. Glasgow~

I really am lost with the friendship now… I don’t really know if I have any friends, especially the ones I find on my Facebook page. I really can’t say that… there are about 5 or 6 on my list of friends that reach the 4,5,and 6 levels of the previous mentioned levels of friendships. But I am confused on whether we are really at those levels… And the one person I consider to be my best-est (not proper I know) friend isn’t even on Facebook and lives forever away… but oh well Facebook doesn’t determine my friends!! And if any of my friends read this and have a question on our friendship I will answer that with this…

“Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down.”
~Brandi Snyder~

<example>

So I went to Toys ‘R Us the other day and all there were inside was f@&#ing toys… What the F!*#… where are all the groceries and cloths, what a waste of time??

<end example>

This is pretty much is an exact replica of everyone crying about snow in Colorado, but about toys in a toy store obviously.

Maybe it’s the fact that a bunch of Californians and Texans moved here and think they are so important to this state that they have the right to know how the weather should be.. I don’t really know.  BUT F.Y.I. … Snow is normal, we live at the foothills of the ROCKY MOUNTAINS… I know we have been in a drought (for the last 10-15 yrs) and snow has been lacking and in certain situations it isn’t always the best, but we should be happy we are getting moisture back.  I am definitely stoked on the idea of snow being on the ground, even though it affects my ability to skate a little.

BUT… Seriously I am so tired of people saying: FML because of the snow, or even I hate snow, Why is it snowing?, I am tired of the snow….

All of these comments make you look dumb… it is COLORADO. It is supposed to SNOW HERE !!!

I was born in Florida, I didn’t know what snow was till I was 6 or 7, but when I learned about it I LOVED IT!! When I came to Colorado, we had summers that were warm like Florida and winters that sledding was an everyday occurrence. Sometimes my friends and I would be building snow forts for like 4 days straight and finally having a war with snowballs on the 5th day! So much fun, and now everyone is crying like snow is our enemy.. and it’s definitely not it helps with our most important resource as humans… water… and this is how we get most of ours!!

Maybe, it’s the fact that you don’t have snow cloths, or that you don’t like being covered up… or definitely the fact you can’t drive in it! I really don’t know…

A little advice… have you ever been on an ice rink with tennis shoes on?? Well you can walk on it, even run… but the second you make a sudden change in the way you are moving…  you will lose traction and slide!! Same idea with cars and trucks. Four wheel or two-wheel, front or back wheel drive… you must be smooth and understand the car’s weight shifts or you will slide… Also the faster you are going, the smoother you must be… and the farther you must think ahead!!

I personally drive the worst vehicle ever for snowy conditions. It’s a 2wd Toyota Tacoma, extended cab, automatic and a 4 cylinder engine… its rear wheel drive and it’s so light that me and two other friends have.. and can lift the rear of the truck in the air… (Yes the rear tires off of the ground) I have driven this truck in the mountains in the worst of the worst in the last 4 yrs and never slid off the road and the only problems I have ever had; is taking off from a lite, or a complete stop… especially up a hill. The problem with most drivers is they are rushing, not paying attention, and not pre-thinking of what they should be doing next. The biggest problem, mainly people think the car is going to drive them through the snow, when the driver is really the controller of the car and you make the vehicle work or not!! (just so you know, or in case you didn’t know) So you should probably learn how to drive on icy roads, because Colorado is supposed to have snow!

So if you are one of these people who cry about the snow, or that it’s too cold outside… I say… Get use to it or MOVE AWAY!! Or become one of those that leave to Arizona for the winter and back here for the summer!….

BUT DEFINITELY QUIT YOUR BITCHING!!

~Maltbie Davenport Babock~ (Changed a little to remove the religion in it)

         I left this quote because we all experience a loved one to leave our life prematurely and feel that it will affect us terribly, and it usually does… but that is only because of the grieving part of it. I have lost one important person to me and have learned that it isn’t healthy to be sad about it… instead, when the thought of them enters your mind think of the good times. It is these, that the person that left us would want us to remember. Some memories may bring a tear, or make us emotional, but it is important to celebrate their life not dread on their death…

         Patrick left us, whether we knew him or not, very prematurely and the reason is unknown to many of us. He was a friend, a son, a young man, and a great skateboarder! I didn’t know him all too well but saw him grow while he lived in Pueblo. He left to Denver, and all I heard was these stories from his friends(my friends) how good a skater he was. He wasn’t scared of shit from what I hear, and he had some troubles with the law, but who cares!! I am only writing this to let everyone know that great people are everywhere in our life and some we will know and some we won’t.

        I remember one time my homie Ricky D, said let’s go skate with Patrick. I was like alright and he was about 4 yrs younger than Ricky who is like 8 yrs younger than me. I was hesitant to it because… I hadn’t really noticed his skating and I really wanted to go try some crazier stuff to get Ricky ready for filming…

       So we go bombing down Union St. in Pueblo, and this kid was crazy… Poppin’ big ol’ ollies and kickers. Then we stop at the Riverwalk at the end of this hill and there is this spot… A pop over rail down like a 6 or a 7 stair.. and without hesitation the mother f@&ker just pops over it… I was like what the.. and then he starts talking about doing a kicker over it  and does it. This kid was super good and I had no clue. That even push Ricky to do a front side 180 over it… Best memory of that guy!!

      Well Patrick!! I don’t know what it was that pushed you in this direction, but I wanted to write this for all of his friends to know that he wouldn’t want you to fret (be sad). He is the type that would want you to remember his ripper times, because I am sure there were a bunch of them!! Also to everyone, Life is only life because there is a beginning and an end. If we could decide how a life is to go, it wouldn’t really be a life, it would be a fact. And if life was predictable, then it would be pointless! So live it to the fullest and swing at every pitch… don’t worry about the strike-outs and take your walks, because sometimes you will get hit by a pitch, or swing for the home run… but only every once in a while will you hit a grand slam.

LOVE YOUR LIFE even if nobody else does!!

I have the weirdest dreams ever.. especially in the last few months (well since september) and I wont let you know my thoughts on why. So anyway, for instance my dreams are extremely vivid. Like HD color and picture, and they don’t stop. Last night I dreamt I was a poet and I would just sit there for hours on end writing poems. Every once in a while I would say one to someone. I even woke up seven or eight times throughout the night and the dream would just start right where it left off. In the last few months I have been dreaming about this girl a bunch… I mean a BUNCH!!

Why? What is the reasoning? How? Is it bad? Is it freaky to anyone else?

Of course I have a crush on her.. I think? Well, when is a crush to big? Okay, whatever… yes, I like this girl, her smile, and personality.. well… i don’t know.. no words to describe the feeling I get… but anyway…

Dreams… what are they for? Are they so your mind doesn’t sleep? Are they for you to wake up confused, sometimes depressed that it was just a dream? Do they mean something? Arrrgh… I wish I knew.

There is this one dream that I have had since I was about 14 years old and don’t know what it is supposed to mean to me. I mean of course it might not mean anything but it has to since it keeps happening. I can’t even really explain the dream… it is very understandable to me but I can’t put it in words. I have even had this dream recently and she was in it! What the hell? This dream makes me feel uncomfortable, but I don’t hate it. Sometimes I feel like I am supposed to get something from it, but I am not sure what it is? I know that it has a lot to do with what has been flying around the spider’s web full of so many ideas you don’t know what is real… yeah the internet. The Apocalypse… the end of the world stuff… I don’t know, if I could put my two cents down we are creating it ourselves (obvious through my other blogs).

Well I don’t know if I should try to explain this dream or have it analyzed and see if I am crazy, or just let it keep bugging me and see if one day it all makes sense. I do know that if she stays in my dreams I don’t mind it at all!!

A poem from my dream… unfinished

Her hair is like the art you never see.

Her face, smile and personality are perfect.

The warmth of her body when we hug soothes me.

Total confusion when she looks towards me like after a car-wreck.

But having her near and looking my way,

Is good…[ can't remember anymore ]

Lately I have wondered, are we doing what we are supposed to? Are we suppose to do anything in particular? Are there certain things we should accomplish? A bunch of questions I still can’t answer, and probably wont ever try to hard to answer it… Not that I don’t care or think I have the knowledge, it’s just that there are so many different answers and I don’t think one will actually sum it up.

I personally LOVE MY LIFE, the good, the bad, and even the ugliest times that I have had… In fact some of the times in my life that have brought me down the most, have actually help me learn more about life. Is that what life is? A struggle that we are supposed to fight our way through. Sometimes I like to look at it like that, but some would say that isn’t good to do. I have had many struggles in my life and don’t need to cry about them because many other have had the same or even worse. But these are events that I cherish the most, because they made me what I am today.

The few things I have learned, is that learning is very important and one of the main factors of life… because every experience you have gives you some kind of knowledge to push you to your next experiences. Another is that there is no way to predict what is going to happen in the future, unless you are some kind of person that has invented a time machine or traveled back in time.. LOL. But, even then I feel that it would be hard to keep the path the same. Grab ahold of your passions and follow them no matter the case, even when people tell you that it is a deadend or not worth the time in your life, because it is your time and you are allowed to spent it however you want. Furthermore, don’t be something you’re not because it’s cool, do it because you like it and don’t allow influence to take you off track, only allow them to help you in your path. And lastly, I have learned that if you are just positive,  mostly positive outcome with come forth.

So in conclusion, I would just like to THANK those who have been part of my life. I could write a list of those that have helped me in my life but I would definitely not be able to spent the rest of my time doing that, because I wouldn’t have time to meet those that are in my future. So if you are one of those that don’t love your life, I suggest you stop trying to answer all the questions and live and let learn as “Guns N Roses” would say.

Lastly stop trying to answer the questions and start asking more of them because that what makes you stronger, I think!@

P.S. Top ten thank yous I will give because I wanted to…

Grandpa, Grandma, George (my cat), My teachers throughout school (Especially the Sams, and Ken), Those that have screwed me, Steven, Skateboarding, Uncle Bill, Mom, and definitely not last but my tenth… Tommy!!

     My Grandfather, my biggest influence in my life, and he was the one that implanted these thoughts into me. (I miss you very MUCH) He was very successful and could have been filthy rich, but decided to be more generous than selfish. He gave so much to those less fortunate than he was. This wasn’t just monetary, but he would help people with their homes, with their relationships, stresses and help them to gain things that they needed, NOT WANTED. I don’t know how he was pushed to do this. Maybe it was his faith? Or possibly the fact that he had nothing as a child and didn’t want that for anyone else? I really don’t know, I couldn’t ever get him to give me an answer. I believe that this caused him to never gain the level of being extremely rich with money, but he was loved and respected from many people. He didn’t give handouts, he just helped with things that he thought were important to society.

     When I was younger, I used to get upset that he wouldn’t be greedy or try to become more rich so that I could have the material items that I thought I needed. I started to realize these things after I started to become more educated, but it wasn’t until his last few weeks that I realized why he did the things he did. One thought I have is that, was that his father died when he was 3 years old and maybe this pushed him to try to be a father towards everybody he had contact with. Honestly I really don’t know, but the help that he receive in those painful weeks that cancer took control of his body finally to take him away from us was a blessing in disguise. So many people came to our aid and didn’t expect anything from us. In fact the only $$ that was spent from his last three weeks was the radiation treatment that he receive from the greediest people, THE HOSPITALS!! I really was hit extremely hard from his death, but I was hit even harder when I saw the hundreds of people coming to help my Grandmother and Grandfather in their time of need, and can’t say anything more than THANK YOU, I TRULY APPRECIATE IT!!

     I know that if people were more like him, especially in big corporations that there would be more PEACE on Earth and more people striving to do good for all instead of their pocketbooks. I could go off on this for a while. But, I won’t because once the bug or virus of greed has entered your body, its like a disease that overcomes and can’t be removed. The story of “Scrooge” is a prime example of the way our world is and I wish the ghost of the future would come and show us why we are all wrong in chasing this almighty dollar, before it is too late!!

OR MAYBE WE DESERVE IT!

Well this isn’t true… it is true if you are expecting huge amounts of money. I think that this big chase for power and all the money in the world is STUPID. I agree everyone should have some money and people should be allowed to capitalize and live the American Dream… but what we are experience is hording of money, and the use of it to be outright selfish and to get more! That’s the funny thing… everyone says when I am rich…. ah bullshit.. you will be greedy and worry more about losing the money than enjoy it!!!

And all this companies… you don’t really care about the holiday, except for the fact it brings shoppers and spenders!@

@gonyporvid@

They also stated that search engines reliability numbers are rising in 2008… that is scary when usually, unless searched all the time by numerous people, you have to dig for the information you are looking for.

People are using the internet for speed… We all want to freeze time and the only way that is possible is to speed up the things that we normally do. This is the reason for the decline on the loyalty to the newspapers, it is easier to type in the story into the homepage (usually google or yahoo) and getting it without having the extra steps of finding it in the newspaper Web site, or waiting at home for it.

I do believe that this is also very scary… these people are professionals and are paid to get the news correct (everybody messes up). Soon there won’t be a paper and people will only get the images that come to them from the internet… and ”localism” will be lost! Stories and agendas will only come from a select group of sites… will we be more robot-ish then?? LOL

Well I agree that speedy thing make things in life go a little faster, but soon we will depend on technology so much it will be hard to live without it… Maybe it already has!